The I that is struggling.

There is an entity within that speaks all the time and that entity is where all the desire, fear, confusions are, that entity can be silent and can be speaking. It can be positive and it can negative. It can be aligned or it can be resistive.

The voice is unpredictable in the sense you don’t know how it will react later. Then there is an action-reaction mechanics. Every reaction becomes subject to a new reaction. This becomes the cause of actions unless I have a predefined set of actions.

There is a lot I know about this I. It is associative in nature, very rapid jumping in the past. sets of desire basically become voice. The knowledge influence the voice. and the effect of surrounding, the default.

This is a machine and under a strange influence action and reaction happens.