believe in process

clearly things are not happening as I assumed them to be. infect the major problem is not having any certainty anchor at the moment. today I woke up and I was clearly not in a good state of mind. it’s been a month and I have no clue where time went.

can I make a ritual a certainty anchor. as I don’t really control outcome or what really happens. only thing I can work upon is my input.

and I need to stop striving to create a perfect scenarios and be comfortable with good enough. some things will be figured out along the way, wether I plan it or not.

in last whole month I took refuge in “the idea of I am solving financials”, well in reality it was not a full time thing. and because I make it a full time thing I wasn’t even doing it part time. instead of full time it got to be strategic.

I need to find a baseline ritual and a strategy to find a job. run experiment and open to relationships. and the same time be open to serendipity.