Breath.

It somewhat feels like there is a lot of emotions and now you are talking so you don’t feel them. But in process you are only making it worse. What you suppose to do is breath and it is not easy.

Where did I went in other direction. I was making progress but how did I let go and let illusions take over. I think the major reason was unreasonable expectation of growth. And expecting the wrong result all together. The second thing was very poor diet from daily experience also I was not up for this level of constant stream of Challange. And it is hard for me to do the thing with less than perfection.

I learnt tremendous amount about myself in these 8/9 months. So why do I think I lost my way ? Specially mind is not calm enough to understand reality at the moment. I am somehow more focused on keeping myself busy than anything else. It’s like dirt all over my face. I can’t see.