but I am like that*.
* => at the moment
so sometimes I make stupid comments, sometimes I judge people, sometimes I stuttered, sometimes I get afraid, angry, jealous, pride and whatnot. and in my previous life I would do anything to deny it. even if I accept some of them I would go to extent to hide it from other peoples.
but perspective is shifting towards it. I don’t see them as bad things even though I might feel some emotional noise, and I don’t try hard to manipulate them.
all of these things and my current behaviour is clear manifestation of my inner state and character. and to be honest this is what I am right now at this moment. this is exactly where I stand at my spiritual journey.
why would i manipulate any of these feelings, these are the signposts. they are helping me, guiding me, letting me know where I need to work most.
the best part is I am happy to accept myself with all the good and bads, and the great part is i am getting better with time.