assertive - call it out.

get out of the compliance shell and own your thoughts. for example talk with zostel foreigner people,

scenario - ridiculing. basically saying your thoughts and belief are stupid. understand you didn’t really challenge their stance. but they are just saying it about your beliefs.

this is the clear violation of boundaries and you have to call them out, every time. start with gesture. wtf. don’t sit and node your head and laugh. no even if you have to break the flow break it ( clarify your stance or situation ). now at this point other person should get the idea not to toy with boundary. but if he took it on his ego, and said something even more mean. learn to exert some power. frame has to be correct. one good tactics is become fully logical in a emotional situation and ask them to clarify their stance.

the other scenario is the example when you in the attempt to build rapport said something to other person which he took in a insulting way, or you may be really insulted him. fundamentally you challenged their core identity in a negative way, understand their response of ridiculing you is not the insult. but the their defense. chances are you are dealing with aggressive maybe even non-responsive person. usually make the shallow talk with with them. if they are not into the depth. leave them there. but look out for the insult about you and all. assert your thought and belief and if you find anything insulting just throw back something similar about them. ( convey I am not here yo listen you bsing about my place. ). so these are basically aggressive-non responsive kind of people. neither you want to provoke them, nor you want to be played by them. call out any aggressive assertion and don’t insult them.

don’t be afraid of hurting someone else’s feeling.

so in a nutshell if somebody is ridiculing your beliefs and personality, correct him for his misunderstanding. if someone try harder give him a wtf gesture. if he didn’t stop either leave the place or throw back “are you always this stupid or what”. but if someone is making fun of your weakness, extend it with 10 fold. and laugh with them.

if you touched someone else pain point and he protect it with some insulting comment, back down. I am sorry I didn’t know, don’t go deep with people who are not ready to go deep with. but if they are insulting your place for example, bounce it back with same intensity. with a bit of unapologetic tone.