direct from the heart

I am at auroville, not really sure where I wanna go. what I want to do after this. neither depressed nor inspired.

the most important thing seems to be self knowledge. and the most immediate problem seems to be finance.

in these 4- 5 days, mainly I’ve to figure out where to go from here.

travel is great thing. but traveling is not the goal. infect for that matter pain or pleasure both are not the goal either. the goal is to know how to live a life worth living. the goal is to be extremely comfortable in my own skin. the goal is to get incredible clarity on my actions.

certainty has a strong gravitation and refuge is becoming a constant enemy.

social appraisal and temporary indulgence is causing very dissatisfactory hippocratic behaviour.

some part of me believe strongly that I am on the right path.

the expectation of relationship and marriage bothers me.

so called friends and social circle was based on my past life. there expectations are entirely different their understanding of me is something else, more I walk into new space the emptier it all gets.

the focus is shifting more on and more on problems these days, which is causing desperation.

changing place is not going to help me to get out of this situation.

no amount of intellectual understanding of things will get me to the place I want to be in.