Negotiation #5 Trigger the two words that transform any negotiation.

Taking any negotiator form listening to influencing behavior. The real change comes when a tharipist accept the patient as it is unconditional positive regard. For most of us have conditional acceptance saying and doing things that people consider correct.

The sweetest words you will listen in any negotiation is that’s right. How he arrived to that price. No matter what approach we used it falls deaf on his ear. I notice I first had to negotiate with Benji, you hate him don’t you. That outburst was his version of that’s right. Before you convince them to see what you are trying to accomplish you first have to say things to them that will get them to say that’s right.

Trigger that’s right with a summary, no matter what kind of logic reasoning and questioning we tried we wouldn’t release.

Effective silence, to encourage him to keep talking until clearing out a swamp the emotions were drained. Minimal encouragement. Beside silence use simple phrase like ok, yes, in-hun, Mirror, rather argues, war damage . Label. It seems tragically unfair I see why you are angry. Paraphrase, repeating in his own words. A good summery is the combination of rearticulating the meaning of what is said plus acknowledgement of emotions underlying ( label + paraphrase )
He need to fully and completely summarize all the nonsense that Sabaya is making. The only possible response any one faced with good summery would be that’s right. That’s right signaled that negotiation can proceed from deadlock.

That’s right is winning strategy but hearing you are right is a disaster. When someone is bothering you and won’t listen to anything what would you say you are right.

The moment some one convinced that you truly understand their dream and feeling, mental and behavioral changes are possible. Create unconditional positive regards get to the that’s right and use summery to get there.