#6 The relationship.

It has clearly two parts, romantic and friendship. And you want both. The medium is conversation. The foundation is need of love. The manifastation is the demand of ego. This is a skill you just have to have. And the skill that can only be developed in real life. Just like any skill it has a learning curve and calibration. And doing mistakes is invitable.

State - the equanimus state is the foundation of it. The person infront of you have a need, like you have a need, let’s call it a need of love. The common ground. Another human being is one source of it. It’s not the only source though. Although in our ignorance we can believe this is the only one. There is a power daynamics built into the situation, the person with less wisdom and more need will be dependent on the other person. A frustated or naive counterpart is ego, which demand love from others. It doesn’t work that way.

Conversation (verbal/nonverbal) is the technology through which you deliver the goods. Conversation has 3 levels, superficial - the need it fulfills is the acknowledgement, the mildest form of love. It is not the subject of conversation but the underlying stroking of aknowledgement that counts. A simple question without neediness will do that.

Attraction switches - men or women we all have built in and associative attraction switches, a good looking person is a good person is an assocaitive attraction switch while social proof is a built in attraction switches. In this world these switches are outdated and merely congnative illusion.

Sharing your world - you will not share your world with the person you don’t like or somewhat unsure of. although sharing your world.

Intemate relationship -