Self judgment.

How comfortable you are feeling in a social situation is a direct litmus test for your self esteem. Now there has been time i was feeling extremely expressive and state of mind was such that there was spontenoutiy and ease. For example yoga Retrat. Even when someone was not responding appropriately, I wasn’t taking anything perosnally I knew it was there problem.

And than there was times when I was feeling tough tight. Sighing, apologetic, defensive in terms of what they will think.

Take two situations the love proposal at dwani. Vs playing game at deejays.

Acting while you know your self esteem has taken a hit creates even more downer self esteem. You end up creating deeper cuts.

What makes you feel bad after you bad performance is your self judgement. Strike at you self image.

Why it is so hard to accept that we are wrong. Because we think we suppose to certain way. And if we are not that way, then we are not worthy.

So thats what the self esteem is, we have an image of perfection, that we are judging ourself angainst. And when we are not judging ourself we feel very high self esteem. When we are judging ourself we feel low self esteem.

When we judge ourself we become self conscious.