The game of respect.
The presence of others - when someone is present, I become more conscious, doing certain things are hard. I am not going to be naked. This effect is on the level of heart and mind.
Thumbs up and down - if someone thumbs up or be impressed with my creation it feels magnatic and good. If someone is not impressed there is droping sensation.
showing what I like hiding what I don’t- if I value some action lowly it creates the heart sink and I will try to hide it from other people. According to my world I show whatever I think of highly. Then other tell me what they think, if they say they like it, I feel good otherwise I try to fight or feel unsure. Another close section is doing what others like. Somya did that.
Plain disrespect - when someone disrespect me it makes me feel angry. Or at unease, it hurts to see someone think lowly of me. Also when you be the butt of the joke.
soft feedback - when I gave Akhil feedback I try to soften it by practically lying that spirituality comes on the top.
the effect of liking - a good comment from Vishwesh feels good while a good comment from bikul makes me feel annoyed.
the polar effect - Hrishi good comment and bad comment, like when he worshiped me, and not like when he think lowly of me.
speaking for the sake of it | antisocial - in tushita I spoke because increasing feeling of the droping sensation. When I am not socialising the same sensation comes.
being careful - now I am asking driver to stop the radio and give me the glass and return me one rupee.
unapproving others - the very act of approval feels like a defeat so I ridicule others
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Emotions - especially in the heart area, there is a drooping sensation, magnetic sensation, upward sensation etc. based on all these. This is the inside game, all these experiences are happening inside and triggering these emotions.
Blokage - different things happened since childhood, and you couldn’t
Process it, so they have now became a source to create these emotions. They are not born but created. Alex wedding and then wearing the high class dress next time.
Matching Stories- ofcourse it is two different worlds, if someone matches yours you will like it and if they don’t and ridicule yours. Or disrespect yours. Which is the most likely expectation. You are going to feel quiet disturbed.
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Cause - the emotional movement is the cause or more accurately the fear of certain movement in emotions. Then there is a belief that social life is essential and if you are not engaging than you are missing out, this triggers the emotion of it’s own kind. These two are disturbing factors. Then there are emotions of moving away form some person and getting near to others.
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Vipassana - if you can observe and relax and release with awareness and curiosity it will pass away.
Being comfortable with your feelings - be comfortable with all the vectors, they are temporary and process them as signal and release or learn not something to avoid at all cost.
Laugh at yourself - be comfortable with the mistakes you make, and fully discuss the embarrassments and failure. Reach the point where you are more than anyone is interested in laughing in yourself.
Impersonalize - nothing I say or do is because of other people, nothing other people say or do because of me. Ingrained it.
use that signal - sometime the emotions actually shows you the fault and direct you to shortcoming and better area.
know what you want in your scocial life - be clear of what you want and be realistic in this endeavour. Know what you like to talk about and then just have good social skill.
taste the better tree - compassion and self realisation.