The other angle.

what exactly girls are looking for -

Lin - she was looking for someone decent and loving. just someone who is not abusive and controlling. she loved me taking lead and she following. she loved the authenticity and expression of self. on the other hand she has slightly low self esteem. she also had a need to be in a relationship. she was in india for two years, and haven’t dated anyone.

so she had a desire to be in a relationship, and I was a non judging, confident, hygenic person with whom other person can connect. who took the lead and took her out. she did all the chasing and I escalated.

on the surface it looks though she wasn’t my type but as she became comfortable, man she is quite a different person.

J - she has a desire to make friends. she quickly connected with me, the conversation was easy and flowed nicely. I sent her message and then she took the lead. I escalated. and we became pretty good friends now.

she also has a low self esteem, and she had a more then desire, she had a strong need, she is somewhat alone in india, moved in because of love of her life, and ofcourse it is not as she thoughted. she is hustling. she has good but shallow understanding.

Preksha - as we become familiar, she has a clear desire or attraction, infect it was on the level of desperation at one point, he mind is in chaos. there is so many things that she can’t think straight. there was sense of similarity and then huge dissimilarity.

we went out couple of time, but then I was not what she was looking for. she was mainly talking and there was lack of connection. and I escalated too much too quick.

The south indian girl - she has a very strong need and desire.

Ritika - she as looking for someone good looking, and was at the state of desperation.

The isiraily girl - I started the conversation and she became friendly.

Jenny - we had a quick connection.

the common pattern is this. you start a conversation or smile, and that creates familiarity, that leads to the conversation. now if she has a need or desire it becomes apparant. and it becomes clear in their body language.
[ Lin, J, isirially girl, kavita…]

so you took them out. if you don’t connection dies[ the english girl ]. and that outing tells you a lot about each other. you let her make the call and ofcourse you also know whether you are interested or not. in case of ritika I had no interest. In case of J I wanted to know more.

the more similar the more effortless it would be the more dissimilar the more efforting it will be, common sense.

If I look it from her point of view, she has a need, desire, or attraction. an emotional component. Lin, J, Jenny, Hawai, Kavita, Prekhsa, Ritika… every one of them has desire or need but also kind of blockage. some people has a need of connetion, esabell, J not romantic but desire. some people feel attraction like deepika. some people has no need like girl from germany.

once the need, desire or attraction is there. and you introduce and become familair they are now start searching that desire in you. Lin was looking for soulmate, J was looking for freind, English girl was looking for I don’t know but for something, hawai girl was looking for one night stand.

as you start to hang out that becomes clear wether what they are looking for you, is in you or not. accrodingly there interest is raising or dropping. ofcourse things like time running out or not getting it, stimulate that need more deeply. on the other hand it can also kill the need.

nothing is more appealing in the world than a genuine expression of self.

so really it is as simple as that, introduce to yourself. and then if they have the need or desire, they display it, if it is what you want in terms of depth or experience take it further. and it becomes even more clear. eventually, it polarizes.