Few days back I saw a child in a super market. He was pretending that the floor is like an ocean and he was swimming. Practically sweaping the floor. Now his pranents seems to be very embarrassed, but that child has no trace of embarrsment. And that is a very high self esteem. He doesn’t care what other people will think or say. He is capable to expressing himself as it is. And we all started like this child, full of self esteem and confidence maybe different degree to different people but something happened as we grew up, that forget sweeping floor with shirt now it is so hard to just express our opnion. So the question is what happened.

Did you know mahatma gandhi lived 94 years. Did you believe it? Nobel prize winner physchologist Danial coheman call it cognative bias. We are wired in such way that that we believe first and when we have strong evidence to disbelieve, even if I tell...

Fundamentally, Emotion is a sensation. Around the chest and head area. Fear is tightness of chest with sensation like something is dropping. Inspiration is the tightness of chest with upward movement. Lust is dissolving and feeling light in the chest area.

Emotion can be intiated by a memory, other persons journey, or without a reason. The voice often try to recreate the emotion by past memories.

All the emotions are temporary. The default emotion without voice and emotion is peace. The default emotion of uncentered mind feels like hunger.

The concept of emotional tank lives in the realm of voice. The more experinces it has the more data it has to recreate and ponder over these memories and create different emotions. When you don’t feed it, the emotion of deprivation feels like pounding in the head.

If you can transcend the story of voice the default of heart is bliss.

You don’t need to have all the answers. Or more accurately your mind that call itself ME, doesn’t need to have all the answer. And you don’t need to worry about all the parameters.

If I don’t force myself to figure everything out and just relaxed in the lead of god. Deciding and chasing all the things but running on a shaky foundations of opnions.

Does the awareness has the quality to guide me. Does the voice has any control on the future. Can I just relax and focus on my job and self growth, with the focus that everything will play out as it suppose to be.

Should I force myself, and can I solve worlds problem, can I make a lot of money? Can I just do what my heart is telling me, and sensible to me, and have fairly things will turn out the way they meant to be.

Is it all the game of prakarti !!

Keep your focus on what matters, take a step at a time, refine your body and mind, and...

Work -

• a video a week
  • set the ritual in place. [2hr content | 2hr delivery]
• marketing management.
• video on entreprenuership.

Spirituality-

• strengthen the ritual.
  • wake up. | know what matters.
• the untethered soul.
• the surrender experiment.

Social -

• what is emotion. How much I need.
• re-crafting the social life.
• romantic relationships.
• dealing with hard people.

Health -

• arumrtha bindu.

Spirituality -

• know what matters.
• implementing ritual and assessment.
• the untethered soul.

Social -

• know what matters.
• emotional tank
• understanding emotion.
• amrutha bindu | cultfit | J.

Work -

• know what matters.
• a video a week routine.
• self-image.
• keeping my focus sticked.

Health -

• Amrutha Bindu.

An emotion is the sensation in the chest area. It can be triggered by other peoples journey, voice and image. And facial expression.

When a person is chasing something and obstacle is too big but he is fighting, that is the emotion of inspiration, when you go through this process, it might be frustrating, when other is going it becomes inspiring. This is strong sensation of chest kind of tightening up with upwrod movement and relase of tear. After sometime it passes away.

Emotion of laughter makes the chest area easy and light. Face becomes smiley, It is comfortable. After some time it passes away. It comes when somebody stupid takes him seriously. Somebody misread the situation and tried.

Emotion of break up feels like tightening of knot. Comes when you are separated from someone. Emotion of anger comes when you are being mistreated. Or someone voliating, abusing the power. Emotion...

sprituality -

• reframe. Know what matters
• set the ritual and assessment ( observing the voice | truth ).
• new place.
• vipassana update.

social -

• reframe. Know what matters.
• what is emotional tank and how it affects.
• engage in Amrutha, Deejays, Cult.
• assessment.

work -

• reframe, know what matters.
• self esteem video.
• how to stay focused. [ marketing 100rs/day ]
• outline online course.

health -*

• reframe, know what matters.
• ENT.
• yoga class
• food template.

Social -

• lunch | help | getting closer.
• sexual education and mastery | audit of skill | how much it matters.
• audit of relationship with emotional balance | acceptance| help.
• the break up communication| heart-break| bitterness and lies| goodbye.
• the journey of relationship with Lin.
• the social re-calibration.
• postponing date with J.

Work -

• edit | slides | audio | music of stay focused.
• intro
• publish | Seo | post
• Adwords youtube first ad| ad genius class
• online course mastery class.

spirituality -

• unthread soul | gita | Anjan chah.

Health -

• ahsamyu.

A full circle. One way or another I have experinced pretty much all the aspect of social life. And solitudal life, I am also very comfortable in pretty much all the social situations. You know the cost associated and have a skill to manage social life.

Now the question what do I want? and what should I expect?

Alone-
I lived alone in rakkar. I lived alone in dharamkot and bangalore, and I excperienced strong urge of social stimulation. Maybe it wasn’t social stimulation but plain urge and soical stimulation became just an object. In that desperation I found myself making feeble attempts by calling akhil, or talking to strangers. Alone I feel dry. That’s the theory.

Being controlled by parents -
The constant attempts to control by mom, sometimes by dad and rarely by brothers to be the way they imagine me to be. Judgment and advice. This makes me uncomfortable.

Relationship with...

Yesterday my parents called me, and I picked up the phone after seeing Lin last time. the first thing papa asked me where was I. and i lied unconciously, I was eating food. probably because I wanted to left alone.

and then papa started to accuse me, I changed the subject. we talked on that. and then my mom took the phone, and now she started to accuse me, advice me. acting out of fear. controlling. either book our ticket or yours. ab tune ki kuch gadbad.

It makes me angry. to cut off the communication itself, seperate myself from all this. it makes my mind very angry. You know in a way it is expected behavior from her. and I know it is a lack of eqaunimity from my side.

this episode is organic, it is the manifestation of me being in unstable mental state and other person being controlling and demanding, that too in the close relationship. and I was missing the clarity. this was one of...