For this you need to know what is the next thing you need to learn.

Not just believing others opnions but taking in only after contemplation.

Working on your weakness.

Every time you make a wrong move and you contemplated the next time it becomes automatically ingrained in your character.

Every time you make a mistake the voice creates self judgment and low self esteem. it becomes unstable which only makes it hard to learn from the failure, the voice subside and you get chance to reconsider. and handle the situation differently from next time.

The quality of contemplation makes the difference in the response in next time, and that is process of learning and change.

The major challenge is the voice becoming unstable and me acting on it, if you know that it is going to happen and keep your focus on the problem, you can win. the second is the quality of contemplation and dignosis and root cause analysis, the challenge here is it requires more enegy to do so and not taking actions feel sweet hell.

I was in standup and all the sudden akshay made a suggestion on well let’s do the cross reviews. This adds burden on me and even though I am agreed to the cause, silentetly being agreed doesnot sound good idea. being silent means being agree.

In the evening I kind of showed the disppointment towards vignesh and it wasn’t pleasent for him as he is trying his best. same with humiliating tanya and mohammed. They are doing their best.

In the conversation with konark I was too agreeable.

In the evening kind of air is coming which passed off soon. In that time zone it emotion and voice feels very unstable and fast moving and irrational. espeically when you are struggling and that is the whole point.

I seemed kind of surprised and konark was telling me more. Same conversation again happend and this time I did the right action.

I stayed on track with what I decided even when mind was...

In the first half, I was kind of lost in the sense I need to do the algos but as .I continued on the path of interview bit I was seeing more videos and less practice, and learning a little, I switched gear to codality and did some practice. and then came back to algos. I could help stop doing algos questioniar.

In the after noon again kind of exploratirty walk on react. These are paraphiral working.

In the standup mind was self aware. and I did standup.

In the evening I was planning to do the yoga in the room. and kind of end up doing algos.

There was a sense that I am learning but am I learning the correct thing.

then in the yoga class, I did posture with ease to not hurt my knee cap. and it was easy way out for doing the easy stuff.

The voice was noisy in the evening, judging me and then justifying etc. and now it is gone.

It seems very important that I keep moving.

When I am working there comes a time when me turns into kindof agitated and says let’s change the subject. this is just a voice and little bit sensations [while making plan for the work]. this is the cap, tomorrow I wanna see how far I can continue and what happens when the voice speaks and I still continues.

Once I learn that I had tooth problem, I was thinking of the principles of when I know something needs to be done act quickly. There is a step or process of research before taking actions. Me tend to take the decision quickly and it seems that process of research is uncomfortable.

Current trend of thinking is short term, I can turn it into long term. Pimple on my face bothered me.

The highlight of the day was the second meeting with doctor, decision wise I think I took a good decision, but when I was talking to the doctor second time, his body language is getting irritated which...

It is clear that I need to get it out. the two on the left are must at this point. the other two are not causing any problem but from prevention point of view can be taken out since it is not aligned and will cause problem later.

Now the place of doing this. I can do this in fortis. After this, it may follow filling and root canal treatment.

Your job is to get the best possible oral health decision.

If I don’t take it out now, it will affect the oral health later and most likely both teeth may needs to be taken out, that is just not the good idea. so taking out the teeth is necessary. and the doctor know it has to be both.

There is nothing wrong on the other side of teeth and can be taken out maybe an year later. If the other teeth has been impacted than take care of it immediately, the doctor is decent so you don’t need to worry about.

Now the question is should I take all four...

What are the important aspect of work.

Freedom - At the moment the vipassana and meditations are hight priority stuff, I will do one month course and then I will have more clarity, till april I have no work commitment. I want to solve this puzzle first. I am getting engaged with the thoughts instead of watching them. Very quickly my mind is being purified. First I want to solve this puzzle of I, mind and all this world by experiential understanding. I also have a lot of momentum in my practice at the moment. Doing one course every 3 months and serving and 2 days course these are really helpful until I get established in this.

Financial freedom - I have enough money and my skillset is getting better and better, and I can survive and thrive currently and the opportunities will only keep getting better. Also given the engagement I am currently in, It gives me all the finances I need to...

I completed most of the task I decided in the morning.

Sometimes there is a tug of war that I should read more, or do more of the practical aspect. [ read goggin, take notes ]

I did a job in yoga class, I hadn’t reach the point to push myself, it wasn’t that intense but after that I felt a bit unease.

Thought of nailing down the toptal is bubbling, focusing the entire attention there and what can be done in that realm.

I clearly I need to work on aptitude questions. and then mastering react and express, with topping up vue.

consolidate the syllabus and then go after it. shorten the boundaries and do it. do the essential and what is necessary.

I am the same person who in the heat of destruction of the family, everyone is falling down, yes my brother was standing up. stood the side by side and then figured the shit out of freelancing. and earn what seems to be something unreasonable, hook my brother and help my family to get back on the the foot.

I am the guy who hired a person when I was in third year of collage.

I am the guy who went to the hyderabad and then kolkata, common man, kolkata and made my way.

I am the guy who moved to synechron defying all the aspects of MNC thing.

Who leave job and go the himalayas all by myself, learn meditation.

I am the guy who could not speak at all forget having girlfriend, in the day of my dubai farewell I could not speak, learn, read every fucking bestseller on communication, Own the NLP room, stayed with this beautiful women and let her go, and having avalaibilty to women like...