There is this continious flow of awareness. and then it gets sucked up with these combinations of emotions and thought and then return back.

One major thing here is the action, and it comes from 2 places. The action that happens through past attachments are time suck and reinforcing. This is a problem.

The action can also happen through intelligence although it can cause momentary emotional pain.

You have to make the choice whether you want momentary emotional discomfort with a beautiful and rich life, or you want to keep momentary pleasure and keep falling.

Great practice.

There was these combintations of thoughts and emotions, I continued. and they completely phases out. There is growing sense of unimporntance of these, and the power they have over me.

The path I chose with intellect was 4 domains and constant growth. It is beautiful path, much better than Impulsive path of these changing thought and emotions.

I am also enjoying being with myself.

Awareness | Mind | Intelligence

At least be firm in the meditation session. Make a sitting of adhisthan. Breath | sensation and at home. Both sessions today could use some more seriousness.

The great thing was I continued learning and it was real learning, real hustel and gain.

I didn’t gave up to any urges but hold my ground.

There is this developing sense of the impermanent nature of things.

There are sexual urges, where I know very clearly It is starting, and then as soon as I start to engage it increases, I didn’t gave up to it. I do not want to go there.

The second is frustration while hustling. comaprision, that completely changes at the end of the day.

Third imporevment is the morning hustle.

Tommrrow I will face these 3 things again, see if I can master it.

• sexual urges. just experience it coming and going. leave the mind and see the sensations.
• if you hustle see how...

The ever-changing stream of thought and emotion, and world. There are laws of body and the way it generates different sensations, laws of thought and external world.

Thoughts or actions further move the cycle. From the perspective of awareness, this is meaningless.

The more my understanding of impermanent and essenceless nature of these thoughts and emotions are increasing, the more my interest in them is being lost.

Having said that thought and emotions have power over me. It is possible to transition the thoughts and emotions with consistently taking the right actions and this state can be uplift which I will do.

But there is a more important search that needs to be done. Leaving aside all the thought, and emotions, and worldly concern. What is left?

This awareness and beyond the awareness. Getting established there, and searching there. Making sacrifices that need to be made.

1. Finish cloud devops degree. Why? moving towards becoming first world class employable full stack engineer.

2. Buy a mutual fund. open a demat account and buy a mutual fund.

3. Make a basic retirement plan.

I use the intellect to know what matters and why. and I use intellect to solve the problem everyday. And I use intellect to understand the reality.

There are different combinations of thoughts and emotions, and they have power over me. They leads to action and multiply very quickly.

My job is to setup a routine and everyday and go through it and face these disturbances and the bigger the disturbance the better it is. The only way to measure it is to see whether you acted based upon that or you acted based upon intellectual understanding.

This is not as much about intellectual understanding as much it is about letting go of the bondage and testing the strength.

Living in the awareness, not in the mind, or heart. Practice being in the moment and in the awareness. There are ease, freedom, and peace in that state.

On the same level is the attention, diffused. Learn to live here. Practice it.
Everyday when I eat, I stay in this state.

The way of life is simple.

I am the awareness, the conciousness, and there are these thoughts and sensations in front of me. Different forms, fear and comparision, lust and images etc. All these combinations try to grab the attention and leads to the action, I stay present and experience these combinations, everyday I do this. I will not allow these things to run my life. Infect I continue to raise the level of it.

Then I have the intellengence which I use everyday to solve the problem I am facing on day to day basis. Understand things and create the path. and walk on it. It is about questioning things and understanding it.

Moment to moment life - There is a world outside, there is inner world of voice and sensations, And there is the awareness that is being hooked and freed. These things changes and life happens from moment to moment.

Finding the highest Joy in self - Withdrawing the awareness from voice, sensations, and world, and just being in the self, at peace and at bliss.

Letting go of amplified voice and sensations - Sitting through ampliifed voice and sensations with the help of principle of impermanence.

using the intellegence to solve the problem - Coming up with the solution with the use of inquiry and intelligence.

Changing the reaction patterns - Change the reaction patterns with intellectually solved pattens.

Practices - Principle of gradual gains, walking and eating presence, 2 hrs vipassana, and 1 hour discourse. Doing something delibrately hard, lethargy and I will do it later.

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