Lin is the person I had most intimate relationship and spent longest one to one time. With her the data is more accurate and personal while with other I don’t know.

simple - she is simple, honest and straight forward person. Her phone and ipad has no lock. As if she has nothing to hide.

non controlling - she seems to help me a lot but do not sees to ask for much, I by nature tend to fill my part, infect I seems to control her.

It is front or back, soft spike and hard spike. It is completely gone. There is colorful image.

It is almost as if it is wishpering different opinions in my ear. And it is gone.

I am auditing thoughts and state of mind every hour. But the question is what I need to do with this data. What I need to find out.

You have to find out

• what is the structure of thought. Get real intimate understanding of it. Know clearly what thought is.
• than you have to trace back the thought to see what is it’s cause. What is the cause of that particular thought. Than intimately understand that process.
• in the night you need to see what is the comman pattern through out the days long thought.

Ultimately you want to reset the thoughts into the different kind of all together. But to do that you need to understand clearly what is it and how it works.

The Dwani Girl. Chiness at momentum. They present themself very attractively that physical attraction is the lure. Akhil’s Gf. Sam. Komal. Niharika. 3D girl at synechron. The smoker next to me. The Mumbai Girl at aurvoville. The girl with plastic surgery. The fancy cloth Indian girl. The smoker at cuppa. The girl with a book in Radhakrishnan. The Mumbai tattoo girl. The newzeland Indian. Starbucks. Ayana anchor. Somaya. Prachi.

Some of them was only about attraction and some has personality with atttaction. And some are naturally attractive.

Renuka, bharti, Australian girl, falafel girl, the deer park girl, South Indian girl at zostel. divorce, isrilian girl, Shilpi, sixen, Lin. Asham girl at tushita.

These are good girls, loyal, adjusting, honest, taking the lower place, caring, they have their dreams. But not self centered.

Akshada, Lin, J, Sixen. Esabell, These people are...

Throughly audit the mind and it’s pattern. And then trace back their cause and how I develop them.

Then you need to change one old pattern and add one new pattern to it.

There is a voice and there is a sensation. And I am the observer. There is a conflict. There is excitement. There is ease, dullness. If I decide to write about the relationship. What exactly comes in between just the voice and some sensation.

How does it make a difference with whatever it says. Or whatever is the sensation is. I think I can be just me.

It goes worse and worse but what exactly it can be a temporary sensation and the voice. What great to great it can be, ultimately it can be only voice and sensation.

There is an attitude which is counterproductive.

The clarity and confidence in the direction is there. I am also very confident in myself as well. The challange is mind not being inspired, pulling in all the direction, freaking out etc. there is no alternative suggestion, just being stretched in different direction.

The mind here is the voice and emotion.

Now the process of training the mind is you need to do it step by step. First of all take the most baseline desire and implement it one strategy at a time.

Then add more strategies to strengthen that belief. And then add the next one.

Today I went to this community building place in Ayana. This was the best opportunity to build networking skills. I talked to Shilpa and drusyant. I could have engaged a little more with Shilpi and that Girl near her. A stranger. But what would you talk about. Is it often that they do this. Now here is the trick you need to ask open ended questions here.

I could ask her what’s your story. But that would have been a big question. I could ask her. What is this thing. How did you switch. A little bit about it. And also introduce to the stranger. Are you with her. How was your experience. And share few of your thoughts on this. And then leave her.

then I had conversation with that girl. And I bombarded her with small question. What should ideally happen is I need to ask her the open ended question and share and stop. If she is interested she will push, otherwise stop. And turn around.

...

“how can I grow spiritually, socially, physically, financially. In this moment.”

RESULT I AM LOOKING FOR:
“Mind is utilising every moment to figure this out. It is practically thinking and suggesting different ways to do it. It is constantly scanning the opportunity around. Every moment when it is not relasing some old garbage.”

“Ultimately you need to create a very strong desire to grow in theses four areas.”

How can I train my mind to do so!!

“Self Suggestion:” I can keep asking this question to myself, How can I grow spiritually, socially, physically, financially in this moment. What is the opportunity!!”

“Visualise:” I can practice the visualization, I don’t know how exactly. But I can do that.

“Negative Consequence| Positve benefits:” what are the natural consequence if I don’t grow, what is the positive benefit and contrast it.

“Knowledge | belief | desire -” feed the...

There is all this garbage that will come, and pass away. It is ok, I can live with this, let’s plant good thought and cultivate it.

Take one thought, a basic thought your mind can stay with and see if you can train your mind to stay with it all the time.

Currently thought related to explaining others, sexual fanatasies, freaking out, lets work in overseas, moments with lin. Etc. are coming.

The thought I want to condition in my mind is that it is totally consumed to grow every single moment spiritually, socially, phsycally and workly.

All the other thoughts will come and go, they might even have some degree of emotion with it, that’s ok. It is expected. Your job is to train your mind in such a way. That this thought occupy most of the space.