The successful negotiation ask your counterpart to do the work, suggest the solution, It involve giving him the illusion of control while you are the one who is defining the conversation. Calibrated question, open ended question this allow you auto introduce ideas and request without sounding pushy. You can’t leave. What are you hoping to achieve by leaving.

If you negotiation effort don’t reach team behind the counterpart then you have hope based deal and hope is not a strategy.

If we made an ask and they granted we’d own. If we ask directly to talk to hostage they will say no. And we were afraid of being embarrassed.

What we are doing was basically we want them to see things our way, they want us to see their way. All the negotiation done well should be information gathering process.they just give us the proof of life now they are expecting something in return as the rule of...

The conditions cumilate in such way that I can really take advantage of next one month at highest.

I have a great place with all the possible facilities. Work place. No disturbance. In a way I have also seen what relationship offers. No worry about food and cooking. A yoga studio nearby. No commitment.

The situation is such that I can take advantage of this to go into a retreat. The most important thing is accelerate the process of self realization and become fully self suffiecent. And live in the present moment without any kind of illusioary hope.

I can also learn cooking and integrate more of yoga.

I can release the thoughts of social happiness expectations and be free from that. Learn other aspect of social and integrate the learning of the relationship with Lin.

I can accelerate to reach the next concrete step in work.

There is so much to be learn that you hardly have a second...

spirituality -

• 1day Vipassana.
• astavakra | astavakra sandeep.
• writing what matters.
• learning of the day
  • indulge or leave senes pleasure| non-verbal disrespected by J
  • switching the objects| forcing to impress|
  • release by food| flow of life
• accident.

social -

• without relationship
• within relationship
• releasing the circle of desires
• never split the bill
  • beware of yes and no. That’s it. Bending their reality.

health -

• cooking. pulav.
• 2wice the yoga.

spirituality -

• astavakra | Sandeep | writing.
• being satisfied without any object.
• upanishad.
• daily plan.

social -

• release the desire of acceptance| impress| sexual.
• never split the bill.

work -

• Sam Walton.
• draw need.

health -

• cooking.
• daily yoga | integrating yoga practice.

Today Lin went out. I am by myself. The day was somewhat circled around her. A month back I was in Jaipur and vipassana. Before that I was in Dharamshala and Rakkar. A month before I was in innov8.

The stream of life flows. And going to keep flowing. People will come and go, jobs will change, someday you will wake up later, someday early, someday tired, someday enegized. Someday some thoughts, someday some other thoughts.

Some flow of event is in your hand. Some are not. Waiting for any kind of time to handle certain kind of situation is a fools game.

You must flow with the life, moment by moment.

Today I was eating too often and following all the food related rituals too eagerly, and even though I made some calibrated progress, I was too often busy and even eager to indulge in food.

There comes the time when you know you are off balance. It wasn’t crazy off balance. But dwindling kind of off balance and then the mind try to compensate this by eating food, searching internet etc. and activity of mind becomes little more frantic.

There is another stream that was contributing which was lack of focus beacusae of injury and effect of relationship on the mind. But this kind of challanges are going to keep coming.

When you know you are getting off balance, take a break meditate. Recenter. And then move on. Without indulging in much of the escape.

Negotiation is never linear formula, we all have irrational blind spot, hidden needs and undeveloped notions. Once you understand their world of unspoken needs and thoughts you will discover a universe of variable that can be leveraged to change your counterparts needs and expectations.

Don’t compromise, win-win pushed by many negotiation experts is usually ineffective and often disastours at best it satisfy neither side. Compromise is often a bad deal, and no deal is better than bad deal. Next time you want to compromise remind yourself the mismatched shoes.

There is no validity in 150k deal. With any compromise the nephew will end up in bizarrely bad deal. We don’t compromise because it is bad we compromise because it is easy and it saves faces. Most people are driven by fear or by desires to avoid pain, very few by their actual goals. Never split the bill, the creative solutions are...

In the morning, it was 9 o’clock, I was already kind of late, I told her to complete her assignment and then spent 1+hour building a calculator for her. She seems to have no interest to use it.

The intention wasn’t to help her but to show her that look I can do this. I wanted to impress her. In that hurry I actually forced my will on her. She didn’t want to use that, or might even have other plans but I forced her any way. Now she is obligated to use it.

If you want to help someone you have to influence in their world, you have to listen and understand their world and when you know you can offer some help then only do it. Otherwise it is just your desire for competition and acceptance.

For some people it will create the argumentative battle for others counterfeit kind of yes.

From your side, It is your desire for compete, impress, praise, acceptance.. that you need to let go.

Taking any negotiator form listening to influencing behavior. The real change comes when a tharipist accept the patient as it is unconditional positive regard. For most of us have conditional acceptance saying and doing things that people consider correct.

The sweetest words you will listen in any negotiation is that’s right. How he arrived to that price. No matter what approach we used it falls deaf on his ear. I notice I first had to negotiate with Benji, you hate him don’t you. That outburst was his version of that’s right. Before you convince them to see what you are trying to accomplish you first have to say things to them that will get them to say that’s right.

Trigger that’s right with a summary, no matter what kind of logic reasoning and questioning we tried we wouldn’t release.

Effective silence, to encourage him to keep talking until clearing out a swamp the emotions were...

Today I did came to office around 9:10-20. I knew what I will do today. Then I was feeling a bit sleepy so I started with something light like writing astavakra and never split the bill. Then I moved to relationship learning and then switching and dancing based on the state of mind.

The boundaries were clear and it was actually useful. The challenge is sometime I will switch even when I am fresh because some work are more demanding in the sense you have to stay before even question becomes clear. And then you know the tricks of the mind.

If you are honest with yourself it is not a bad idea to give it a try keeping the mind satisfied category.